He should’ve stuck to Cortana. No human girlfriend will ever understand how bad it got with the Covenant and then the Flood. Nah, kidding! The true backstory behind this Master Chief mystery is almost too weepy to handle. The bad part is Eric Smith, the guy who spent a ridiculous amount of dough to buy the MC armor from an artist, poured out his heart in a long blog post explaining his life-changing buy. Turns out his fiancé dumped him.

Eric Smith, a certified geek and part time college instructor, went through a crushing phase in his private life. To soothe the pain and the empty hole where his sweetheart used to emotionally reside, he sold the engagement ring he bought her and used the money on some good ole Mjolnir. Then he recounted his odyssey in a long blog post.

The most poetic, Pulitzer Prize winning part:

I’ve seen other Master Chiefs. They wander Comic-Con and Wizard World, visit E3 and the Penny Arcade Expo, and their photos often pop up on Tumblr, expertly crafted, painted to look like they’ve actually been in those epic space battles. Did some of them go through the same thing as me? Maybe.

Because they always look the way I feel: battle hardened.

Read the whole sob epic below. It’s so tender, it might even become a Hollywood movie someday.